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joke jokes jokes by : 10:15 am On July 12, 2018
  1. After your phone battery dies ..you sit
    down to plan your life., and then, BOOM!!!
    NEPA brings back the light..Plan
    suspended! 2. I saw som1 who laminated
    his ATM card 2day, if I mention
    where d person comes frm now, people will
    think I hate
    Ibadan people .. 3. Surviving in Nigeria is not
    easy….
    Someone online wants to sell fridge with no
    door, he’s
    convincing me to use curtain 4. I still can’t
    believe I was born without my permission,
    What if I wanted to be a mosquito 5. See eh,
    Sleeping next to your new bae for the very
    first time
    can be really
    tough.
    You have to breath in English, not too loud
    and not too low. 6. This beautiful girl in my
    street will not come out today that
    I’m wearing fine clothes, its when I want to
    go and buy bread
    she will appear like evil spirit. 7. The only
    thing u can
    get in Nigeria
    without connection is Pregnancy and STIs 8.
    Don’t Trust A Girl Who Doesn’t Use
    Her Fathers Name On Social Media.
    If She Can Deny Her Fathers, My Brother Who
    Are You? 9. On d last day, some guys will still
    be looking at the yansh of
    some girls while going to hell.
    Angels will be shouting “okechukwu enter
    ooooo 10. Ladies.. Not All Guys Who Call You
    In Public Want 2 Woo You; Some Just Want 2
    Tell You That Your Pant Is Showing. 11. If
    you count the number of beds some girls
    have slept on its enough to build 3 general
    hospitals.. 12. You Cannot be a ‘SlayQueen’
    and Be Smelling. Stop That
    Nonsense! 13. And She Blocked me Becos I
    Told Her that Her Short name
    for “Elizabeth is Eliza”not Lizzy 14. Only igbo
    kids will chase a fowl till the fowl develops a
    muscle pull 15. It’s raining seriously here in
    Canada. How about Nigeria? 16. This days
    The way girls like cars ehh you’ll think they
    were breastfed with engine oil. 17. When
    the Pastor is praying that
    whatever that doesn’t glorify God in your
    body should disappear & your D**k
    Disappeared … 18. Those that Cry during
    Worship But Sleep during Sermon. What’s
    their problem? 19. On judgement day
    They should arrange like 10,000 angels that
    will separate fight
    between yahoo boys and white women 20.
    I Miss Those Girls That Use To Cry After Break
    Ups.
    Girls Of Nowadays They’ll Just Replace You
    With Contestant Number Two 21. Double
    heart attack message from a babe to her
    guy:
    1st SMS: Lets break up now, its all over. 2nd
    SMS: Sorry, Sorry, Sorry! That was not for you
  2. Battery Full???
    You Mean I Should Unplug My Phone When
    There’s Still Light???
    Is Like you Don’t Know We Are In Nigeria 23.
    Rich people: 2 slices of bread and tea with a
    small mug
    Poor people: #180 agege bread & tea Inside
    jug featuring
    beans 24. Owerri Girls are now Scared of
    Avalon , Venza , AccuraZDX , Benz etc, Maka
    igba Ara 25. Drinking lots of water can help
    you mind your business cos
    you spend most of your time urinating
    instead of Gossiping. 26. If She is not Good
    in Bed , Biko Try the Floor and Stop
    Disturbing Us 27. Churches should stop men
    from using Bible mobile apps
    while the sermon is ongoing. 95% of them
    are checking
    livescore 28. If you have a crush on
    someone, hide it very well because
    the moment you tell them, they will start
    acting like deputy
    Jesus. 29. Look into my Eyes and tell me you
    LOVE me…. Naso some people take catch
    Apollo 30. You Call Your Boyfriend HONEY
    And Now You’re Complaining
    other Girls Are Disturbing Him…
    Who Doesn’t Like SWEET Things?? 31. If u
    want to woo a Nigerian lady on social
    media, don’t
    start with “hi” I repeat don’t start with “hi”
    She won’t reply u.
    Start with, “Do u use First bank? 32. That girl
    u call smallie, Your Dad may be in her inbox
    begging her to stop calling him “sir” that his
    name is
    “Solomon Maduka” 33. Some Boys Can Form
    and Pretend Just to look like good innocent
    guys. During s*x .They be lyk “Baby, Is this
    the hole?”
    Idiot It’s The Gate, Knock And Enter inside
  3. And He Said Once they Engage you in
    Nigeria, You’ll wash Clothes, wash
    Plates & Cook till the Ring Sef will Fade. 35.
    When she says”i don’t date guys who
    walk”…my brother
    buy a wheelchair 36 You Got Angry Because
    I Forgot Your Birthday,
    Did I Give Birth To You? 37. No girl is more
    happy than a girl whose boyfriend’s mum
    calls “our wife” she can even wash the
    compound gate 38. One thing about one
    room apartment is that you wake up
    and see all your properties at once. 39. “i
    don’t date broke girls”
    Said by a guy who bathes with soap until it
    looks like a sim
    card! .

About sanchez43

Am tall fair in complexion i love networking am an igbo by tribe but currently living at portharcourt

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