When you wake in the morning, what’s the first thing you do?
Pray, Jesus is Lord.
Go to the bathroom.
Check my phone, 99+ notifications. √
What are you talking about? I don’t wake up till afternoon!
If your answer is ‘check my phone’, you may proceed.
What Social Media App Do You First Of All Check?
Facebook: You are more likely to be nostalgic. You want the world to see you and how much you’ve achieved. And by the world, I mean your secondary school classmates who wouldn’t let you join their cool gang, your ex who left you for that Yahoo boy two years ago and your ever faithful village people and their monitoring spirit.
Snapchat: You can be in one of these two categories. First category- you’re obsessed with updating people (do they really care) about every minute detail of your life (hey look at me, I cook egusi soup with raw eggs). Second category- you enjoy taking ridiculous photos of yourself and sharing it with your friends (pointing fingers at guys who take selfies with the flower crown filter).
Instagram: If you’re constantly checking your instagram to see how many likes your selfie has gotten, then you are obsessed with how pretty you are and you want the world to be obsessed with you too. Added bonus, you’re probably a slay queen wannabe and you just want to make people think you’re rich with all those vacation photos and selfies in luxury hotels. Lmao.
Twitter: You think you are really funny and witty too. Among your friends, you are probably the one who is savage af.
Whatsapp: You are a talkative introvert who values close connections. Or you are a mum who won’t stop forwarding all those loooong news columns that may or may not be true facts.
LinkedIn: let’s be serious, is this actually anybody’s favorite social media app? But if it is yours, you’re probably married to your job. And old.